01 | From Spark to Company: Why Talking to Customers Is the Only Real Startup Strategy
01 | From Spark to Company: Why Talking to Customers Is the Only Real Startup Strategy
Most founders believe the biggest risk in building a company is running out of money.
In reality, the biggest risk is something far more basic, and far more common:
Building something nobody wants.
In this episode of The Founder's Path - From Spark to Company, Valerie Cobb sits down with serial entrepreneur and mentor Stefan Avivson, widely known as Mr. Raw, to unpack the uncomfortable truth behind startup failure, product-market fit, and why most founders stay trapped inside what Stefan calls “the cave.”
What follows is a raw, unfiltered conversation about failure, customers, venture capital, AI hype, and the only question that actually matters in business.
Meet Mr. Raw: 15 Companies, 5 Exits, and 2 Bankruptcies
Stefan Avivson is not a polished motivational speaker, and that’s exactly the point.
He’s built 15 companies, achieved five exits, survived two major bankruptcies, and spent over a decade mentoring founders across industries. His experience spans raising millions, losing millions, and rebuilding from depression after personal and professional collapse.
Today, he lives in the United Kingdom, originally hailing from Denmark, and works with founders who are willing to confront reality instead of hiding from it.
His philosophy is simple:
If something isn’t simple, it isn’t right.
The Core Problem: Founders Don’t Talk to Customers
When asked what single piece of advice he would give entrepreneurs starting their journey, Stefan didn’t hesitate:
“Speak to your customers.”
It sounds obvious. Yet most founders don’t do it.
Instead, they build in isolation—inside a metaphorical cave—sometimes for months, sometimes for years. When they finally emerge, reality hits hard:
No one wants to buy what they’ve built.
Stefan has seen founders spend $3–4 million before ever validating demand. In one case, a single customer conversation saved a founder from wasting another $6 million.
The lesson is brutal but liberating:
Your idea doesn’t matter.
Your passion doesn’t matter.
Only your customer’s reality matters.
Product-Market Fit Is Not a Theory (Despite What VCs Say)
During COVID, “product-market fit” became one of the most overused phrases in startup culture.
Investors talked about it endlessly.
Founders chased it obsessively.
Very few could define it clearly.
The term traces back to a short tweet by Marc Andreessen— not a framework, not a methodology, just a sentence.
According to Stefan, that’s the problem.
His definition is refreshingly direct:
Product-market fit exists when your market wants to buy your product on the same terms you want to sell it.
No dashboards.
No buzzwords.
No theory.
Just buying behavior.
The 3 Questions That Reveal the Truth About Your Business
Stefan created what he calls the Raw Reality Check, a simple but powerful exercise used with founders and leadership teams.
You ask employees first, then customers, three questions:
Why did you buy from us?
How likely are you to recommend us to someone else?(Net Promoter Score)
How can we improve?
Here’s the shocking part:
Ask 10 people inside your company→ you’ll get 5–8 different answers
Ask customers → ~80% say the same thing
That shared answer, the one customers agree on, is the only real reason your company exists.
And yet, research shows thatonly 4 out of 100 CEOs actually know why customers buy from them.
The remaining 96% are operating in a reality that doesn’t exist.
Why Sales, Marketing, and “Innovation” Often Fail
Most companies claim they are:
Product-led
Sales-led
Innovation-driven
Stefan rejects all three labels.
If you don’t lead with the customer, you don’t have a company—you have a guess.
This is why sales teams struggle. They’re asked to sell something the organization itself doesn’t fully understand.
As Valerie points out, value only exists when it’s recognized by the customer. Even legendary thinkers like Simon Sinek built frameworks that work in rare cases, but most companies don’t actually know their “why.”
Because they never asked.
AI, Agents, and the Toilet Paper Test
The conversation turns toward AI, and the current explosion of AI agents flooding LinkedIn feeds.
Stefan uses an unforgettable analogy:
AI today is like the invention of toilet paper.
At first, people didn’t see the need.
Then it moved into the bathroom.
Now it’s everywhere.
AI is not ending. It’s beginning, just like the internet did.
But here’s the danger:
Most AI products today are “me too” solutions, built on hype instead of customer need.
If you’re not speaking to the actual user of the agent, you’re just riding a wave, until it crashes.
Technology changes.
Human needs don’t.
The VC Myth: Why Funding Often Increases Failure Risk
One of the most controversial insights Stefan shares is about venture capital.
Once you take VC money, statistically, your odds of failure jump to around 95%.
Why?
Because founders and VCs are playing two different games:
Founders want to build sustainable companies
VCs want one breakout winner out of 10–20 bets
Most startups are expected to fail.
Revenue, traction, and customer validation matter more today because investors finally realized something founders should have known all along:
If you can’t convince customers to pay, even a little, you’re still in the cave.
Failure Is Not the Opposite of Success
One of the most powerful moments in the conversation is Stefan’s reflection on failure.
He openly shares his bankruptcies, depression, and personal losses, including the death of his mother.
And yet, those moments shaped everything that followed.
“The point is—if you don’t fail, you don’t know how to win.”
He even wrote a song during his recovery with the line:
“To stand tall, you must fall.”
Failure rewires the brain.
It changes perspective.
It accelerates learning.
Success doesn’t do that.
The Real Goal Isn’t a Unicorn—It’s a Good Life
In a culture obsessed with unicorns, exits, and valuation, this conversation lands somewhere deeper.
Building a company isn’t about avoiding failure.
It’s about failing faster, learning sooner, and aligning with reality earlier.
Because in the end:
A successful company is optional
A successful life is not
And that starts, not with a pitch deck or product roadmap, but with a conversation.
Final Takeaway: Get Out of the Cave
If you remember only one thing from this episode, make it this:
Talk to your customers.
Not once.
Not later.
Now.
Reality lives outside the cave.
And that’s where real companies are built.
Want more raw, founder-level conversations like this? Follow Valerie Cobb and subscribe to The Founder's Path - From Spark to Company for honest insights on building businesses that actually work.
